Iris Murdoch said, “One of the secrets of life is small, continuous treats”; and while from daily good food to nightly great bourbon I couldn’t agree more...there’s something to be said for going big or going home. ⠀ ⠀ Backstory: We’re not into material things much, but when it came to celebrating my Baby’s 40th this year, I wanted a gift that would make him feel honored, cherished and revered...not for all he does, but for all he is. So I picked a place he’d mentioned wanting to visit together and I planned a five-night, food- and nature-filled trip to Colorado including a private fly-fishing expedition for two; a concert by romantics JohnnySwim; a tasting at a distillery; drives through majestic American sights; and hiking a few lakes in Rocky Mountain National Park. ⠀ ⠀ My wholehearted goal? Remind him what it‘s like to be done for, rather than to do unto others. He thanked me at least a dozen times. And every time, I thought about how much he deserved every moment. ⠀ ⠀ We believe in doing things that make memories. We returned with nothing for ourselves except hundreds of snaps attempting to capture how happy we were to simply be away together since he’s my absolute favorite person. And since it’s been a hella tough few months for us...when it comes to how we actively try to love each other, no emotional cost is too high. If we don’t shower each other, who will? Who’ll model for his littles—my future “steps”—what deep, respectful, playful love looks like? And how can we teach the value of self care if we don’t care enough for ourselves? ⠀ ⠀ So: Take trips. Make a BFD outta your BAE ASAP. And if they say anything about 30-40-50-60 being “just a number,” consider the last time they said, “Gee it’d be nice to...” and make it happen, whether it’s a trip or a kickass date-night-in with their fave scratch-made food. Plans don’t have to be spendy to be meaningful. What’s invaluable, is getting out of your mode of *doing* together and relearning what it’s like *being* together. Prioritize each other first...all day, every day. Birthday or not.
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